ambitextrous

Ambitextrous = Ambidextrous in the act of texting
"Good thing I'm ambitextrous bc when I get carps tunn in my right hand from texting so much, I can just switch to lefty!"

*carps tunn = carpal tunnel

rexie/ano

Rexie = Anorexic
“Whoa have you seen (insert name of girl who lost half her bod weight) yet this year?? She got supes rexie.”

Also:

Ano = [anno] Anorexic
"What, no dessert? Don't be going all ano on me now!"

appt

Appt = Appointment
"I missed my appt at the genius bar today bc my car wouldn't start, due to some d.bag leaving a light on in the back seat. So my comp and car were broken. I may or may not have had nerv breakdown."

attench whore

Attentch whore = Attention whore
"News flash, attentch whore dancing on the coff tabes again, soc sui."

addy

Addy = Address
"Its supes impt to know the addy of wherevs* your hostie is when your abroad. We learned the hard way when we blacked out in Portugal and couldn't find it."
*wherevs = wherever

awk/awkwie

Awk/Awkwie = Awkward
“I am so awk during the first wk of ev new semest I can't even funct.”

ab

Ab = about; you can't say "ab" in a sentence bc abs are what you get when you work out like kiks and kinsk. Peop will get confused. So you say "about" but write "ab."

ans

Ans = [ants (not anz)] Answer
“I couldn’t even ans one quest in class today bc I was so hungovs.”

absol

Absol = [absull] Absolutely
“Sorry I was an absol shitshow last night.”